410. The Scope Of Suffering

As my awareness of self and world expands and deepens, I begin to better understand the sources and scope of my suffering. I gradually become more aware of the simple fact that much of my ordinary experience includes various forms of suffering.

When the world seems to contradict and oppose me, I suffer from frustration or anger. When I compare my life to the lives of those who seem to be doing better than me, I suffer from envy. When memories of what I’ve lost spring to mind, I suffer from grief. When my present circumstances feel stagnant and hopeless, I suffer from despair. When I feel overwhelmed by demands and obligations, I suffer from stress. When the dangers of an uncertain future are approaching, I suffer from anxiety.

As I look more carefully at the particular forms of suffering I experience, I also start to see how these forms depend on my attachments. This is frequently a distressing process, because it means coming to terms with the broad reach of suffering. Discovering that suffering arises merely from my way of life and the structure of the society in which I live can be painful.

I also cannot help wonder how much time and energy I have wasted suffering when I could have been creating joy for myself and others. But this comparison between present understanding and past experience is only another judgment to which I can become attached, which means it can bring forth further suffering in the form of regret.

I have to remind myself that the presence of suffering is nothing to feel bad about. It only demonstrates the incredible opportunity I have to transform suffering into joy through the development of even greater awareness. By allowing my attention to remain free and open, my awareness of the relationship between my attachments and my suffering will expand, which will in turn allow me to continue freeing myself from suffering.