381. Anxious Attention

You see a flash of movement somewhere in your field of vision. It’s quickly followed by another flash and then another. Something is happening and it has grabbed your attention. Rapid movements suggest the possibility of a threat that could potentially bring harm.

If this possibility were sustained over time, it would be natural to start thinking about how it might hamper your desires, activate your aversions, or contradict your beliefs. You would be concerned that the new thing could impact your life in some meaningful way. And because the potential for harm feels real, you might also believe you should continue to pay attention. Worry pushes you to gather more information and figure out what’s happening.

380. Looking For Freedom

When I see something disturbing, I immediately want to look away. Sometimes I want to look away because it’s too painful to see what I’m seeing. Sometimes I don’t want to look because I don’t like what it means — difficult changes will be necessary and I don’t want to change. And sometimes I look away just because I know what I’m seeing requires a great deal of attention and I’d much rather look at something else.

379. Shifting Opinions

Confronted by a new artwork, we automatically form an opinion of it. If the work gives us a positive feeling or at least attracts our attention, then we tend to judge it favourably. Sometimes we like the work so much that we share our opinion with others, so that they can see it and confirm our judgment. We might not think about the work any further and it eventually becomes nothing more than a fond memory.

378. A Wild Animal

Time is passing. I’m cognizant of this fact, even if I don’t want to be. I can see it ticking away in front of me. Not just because it’s displayed on the screen I’m looking at, but because the whole world is moving, and that movement means time is passing.

I might be able to ignore the passage of time if it weren’t for the tasks looming over this interval. Not some future interval, but the one I’m living right now. I should be working. That is what these hours are supposed to be for. There are things I have to do. I have obligations and I need to fulfill them.

377. Being Present

Everything is finally going right and you’re feeling much better than usual. Far from pain and suffering, you’re experiencing delight. A powerful feeling of pleasure, clarity, and peace has developed in you. You cannot ignore this feeling, which you realize must be joy.

But then you start to reflect on your experience. You compare your present experience to your past experiences and possible experiences yet to come. You want this moment of joy to last, but you know it’s only temporary. You know that your situation will soon change and you will return to the pattern of ordinary life. You know that when this happens, joy will also leave you.

376. Free To Forget

We’re always forgetting what we’re supposed to be remembering. When we realize we’ve forgotten, we feel troubled by the fact that yet another important memory has vanished. We suffer through the grief that things are slipping away from us that shouldn’t be.

The obligation to remember is a part of the vast network of social and ethical norms that make our society functional. We feel strongly that we need to remember in order to fulfill the many obligations we have to others. The result is that we form the belief that all of the little pieces of information we hold in our memories must be retained.

375. Creative Possibility

You’re always too busy to do anything creative. So much is happening around you and you’re caught up in all of it. Work is repetitive, tiring, and endless. Demands on your time are overwhelming and you can’t keep up, no matter what you do. Your attention is totally consumed by obligations and basic needs, and genuine creativity feels entirely out of reach.

You try to incorporate creative ideas into your work when you can, but this doesn’t really satisfy you. You want to be able to write and draw and sing. You want to be able to devote your entire body to creative exploration, at least some of the time. But you simply have no realistic way of doing this right now. There is no time, no money, no resources.

374. When I Am Empty

It’s when I am empty that I’m able to see. I see the self and the world as a single whole that is also multiple, as me and also not me. I see the needs of living beings as necessities that require my action. I see how the failure to meet needs produces pain and suffering, which in turn causes other needs to go unmet.

I see that an end to this cycle is possible only with greater awareness. I see that I can help my awareness expand by becoming more flexible, open, and sensitive, which means I need to allow myself to pay attention to everything. I see that it is when I’m most attentive that I also understand how to act. I see that I need no instruction or command from others to tell me what is best.

373. No Time For Doubt

When his eyes open, the wall opposite is lit with an intricate pattern of lines in bright yellows and oranges. He’s certain it hadn’t been like this a moment ago. He stares at the pattern for a time before he finally realizes that the sun must be setting for its light to be at such an angle. Which means it must be early evening. He only meant to rest his eyes for a few minutes, but he must have slept for hours!