146. The Right Kind Of Help

You want to help others in every way you can. When you see people helping in a certain way, you feel you should help in that way, too. If you cannot do this, you begin to feel guilty of being less helpful than you ought to be. Perhaps someone even asks you why you are not helping in that particular way, with the silent implication that only that kind of help is important.

You want to do more, but more is simply not possible. You’re already stretched incredibly thin as it is. Still, you feel like a second-rate helper. You feel like the help you’re giving is not the right kind of help. You feel like your efforts are less valuable than those of others. But all of this is an illusion.

The illusion is produced by your concern about the real value of your efforts and your desire to do as much as you possibly can. You’ve become attached to these intentions, most likely because they align with your deepest values. Even though your intentions are good, they can still cause suffering if you become attached to them. You feel this suffering in the form of guilt and anxiety. By seeing your attachment and its connection to your suffering you can break free of it, and allow yourself to conserve your energy for the important work you’re doing to help others.

You must do good in the ways you are able to do good, and this will be different for every person. You can only help in the ways you are personally able to help. You will help in those ways that energize you and enable you to be as compassionate and caring as you can possibly be. And that is always the right kind of help to give.

If you’re already doing this, then there is nothing more that can or should be asked of you. You’re taking responsibility for the suffering you see in the world, and you’re working to eliminate it through compassionate action.