3. One More Piece

I want to put everything together into a single, unified narrative.

I want reasons that make sense of all that has happened and will happen.

I want to understand how each piece relates to the others and to the whole.

I want to know the full story — the story that completely explains and justifies the world.

Despite these desires, I am always discovering new pieces that resist explanation, that refuse to fit into the story. I am continually forced to revise the story or to create an entirely new one. Even then, there are pieces I must leave out to maintain the story’s coherence. Pieces that lack justification or are propped up by flimsy or fraught reasons. Pieces that do not seem to fit anywhere. Pieces that resist the very idea that a unified story is possible.

In the end, even the most coherent story is still partial. I am always forced to leave something out. This inextinguishable remainder torments me. It laughs at my desire for cohesion, for narrative, for explanation. It laughs so loudly and so frequently that I begin to question my desires. Does it make sense to think that I, a limited and finite being, can achieve the complete understanding I seek? Will there not always be something I cannot know?

Still, I often think I need to find just one more piece. One more piece and I will solve the puzzle. One more piece and I will finally have the whole story in hand. But this belief is an illusion. It is a mirage that will consume me. There will always be one more piece to find. I must recognize my limits. I must accept that my knowledge will always be partial.

The story will never be complete. There is always more to come. This is not a curse, but a blessing. It means there is always more for me to do. While I cannot know the whole story, I can always add to it. I can contribute to its beauty and to its truth.