168. The Sound Of Sleep

The sound of seagulls chattering at dawn. A squawking call building gradually in the first, followed by the response of others forming a strident chorus.

The sound of the bathroom exhaust fan. A steady purr mixed with a pulsing rhythm, going on and on and on, until suddenly the switch is flipped.

The sound of a horn brought forth by an angry driver. First one small burp, then two more in quick succession, followed by the long, steady shout of total infuriation.

167. Suffering And Solipsism

I go out into the world and I suffer. I suffer because it is too cold and the rain never ends. I suffer because there is too much work and so little time. I suffer because other people misunderstand me. I suffer because there is too much noise. I suffer because I have to respond to the endless demands of others. I suffer because everything is more expensive than before. I suffer because my friends are too busy for me. I suffer because people do not pay attention. I suffer because I desperately want everything to be different than it is.

166. Finding Freedom

To be freed from a prison seems to offer great hope. We leave an environment of strict rules and order for one full of freedom and opportunity. We are now able to pursue the things we want. We now have a chance to find happiness. We now have an opportunity to become so much more than we were before.

We think happiness is likely because we expect it to follow from the satisfaction of our desires. When we were constrained by rules and structures, there was no possibility of such satisfaction, and so we suffered as a result. Now that we believe ourselves free, our desire begins to blossom.

165. Passion For Life

When an interest grows beyond the scope of mere curiosity it can transform into an obsession. An obsession forms because you want to possess the object of interest, you want to encompass it so fully that it becomes wholly yours. The intensity of your desire causes the obsession to be born and it quickly solidifies into a profound attachment.

It is attachment that makes an obsession dangerous. It causes you to lose sight of the world, to lose sight of yourself, to lose sight of everything that is not the object of your obsession. You become dull to everything and everyone around you. Your actions are directed only towards the obsession, with no energy left to respond sensitively to anyone or anything else.

164. Power And Responsibility

We know that great power means great responsibility. But in truth, our responsibility is always great, regardless of our power. If we are attentive and aware, we understand that we are responsible for all of the suffering that exists. We must be responsible, for if we are not then no one is. The suffering of an individual does not arise in isolation. One person’s suffering is connected to the suffering of every other, and we cannot completely eliminate our own suffering without helping others eliminate theirs, as well.

163. Empty And Full

He stands perfectly still and takes the deepest breath he can. His head is swirling with thoughts, as it always is. There are too many thoughts to manage, so he does not try to manage them. He lets them come and he lets them go. Now is not the time for thinking.

He lies down on the floor and takes several deep breaths before standing again. He lifts his arms high over his head, as high as they will go. Reaching up, the stretch burns as the tension is pulled out of his muscles. Accumulated stress has taken physical form and he is trying to release it. When he is finished with his arms, he stretches his legs, his torso, his neck and then returns to the floor.

162. Complete Honesty

Complete honesty is more difficult than it might seem. It takes more than providing an accurate description of the facts and events. It takes more than attributing actions and words to the correct people. It even takes more than carefully including everything that is known about the matter at hand.

Honesty requires me to be aware of the things I do not know, and to express my uncertainty fully. To do this requires great humility, for the biggest impediment to honesty is always the self. What I believe and want and fear can have a enormous influence on what I say and do. If I am not aware of these factors and their ability to alter my words then I will always speak something less than the whole truth.

161. A Method For Liberation

You know that your problem is attachment. You can’t help wanting things, and you easily become attached to these desires. You know this causes you to suffer in the form of stress, jealousy, anger, grief, anxiety, and so many other painful feelings.

You want to break free from your desires. You want to know what you must do to bring an end to attachment. You want to be given a list of actions, a method you can follow to extinguish your suffering. You want a method because it seems like this is all you need. Once you know what to do, you’ll be able to free yourself by carefully following the method.

160. Let Your Children Run Free

You’ve been practicing your art for a long time. Your work is getting better, more sophisticated and more interesting. Or at least it seems that way to you. You know your judgment is far from objective, and it doesn’t mean others would think the same.

The problem is that you’re isolated. You’ve been working quietly on your own. Other than a few close friends, no one has seen your work. You feel a need for some kind of recognition. You don’t mean fame. You just mean someone to see what you’ve made and give their opinion of it.