244. The Root Of Oppression

When I’m attached to my desires, I produce suffering for myself and others. Suffering arises because my attention and actions are fully directed towards the fulfillment of my desires. In such a state, I’m unable to see what I or others need and I cannot do anything to meet those needs.

The suffering that arises from my unmet needs can cause me to redouble my efforts to get what I want, out of the mistaken idea that I can escape from suffering by fulfilling my desires. Not only do I deprive myself and others of the care and attention they need, I also compete with them out of the belief that I must in order to stop suffering. I might even directly harm other people by lying to them or manipulating them to get what I want.

243. Folding In On Yourself

The weather looks calm and sunny, so I ask if you would like to join me for a walk. You tell me that you’re too busy right now, that you’re in the middle of working on something. I ask if you might have time later. You tell me that you’ll have to see how things go, that you can’t know in advance how you’ll feel later. I’m forced to accept your uncertain answer, as I can see there’s no point in arguing with you.

242. The World Is You

Everywhere you look, you see yourself. You’re looking out at the world, but you’re seeing yourself reflected back at you. This happens because what you see depends on your perspective, and your perspective is shaped by the rigid structure of your own attachments.

Your attachments are to intentions — to particular desires, aversions, and beliefs that you have. This can include any of the things you know, your values, the rules you enforce on yourself and others, the institutions and traditions you support, and more.

241. What We Deserve

When we do something helpful, we expect to be rewarded. When we do something harmful, we expect to be punished. We see these outcomes as what we deserve to be given from others. If we’re punished when we’ve done nothing wrong or we’re not given a reward we’ve earned, then we complain to others and demand justice.

We keep track of what we deserve and what others deserve. We feel it’s wrong when another person is given something they don’t deserve. We complain that the reward or punishment they’ve received is not merited. By doing this, we protect and enforce the norms that make up our concept of deserving.

240. The Necessity Of Compassion

Compassionate action can be difficult and demanding, so it’s reasonable to wonder why we should want to become more compassionate. From the perspective of ordinary self-interest, perhaps the answer is simply that we shouldn’t. What we actually want and need is to suffer less and to live more joyfully.

An examination of our suffering quickly reveals that it arises from attachment. We’re human beings, which means we reflect on our experiences and we form desires, aversions, and beliefs that combine to produce ideals that we can easily become attached to. When these ideals are not achieved, we suffer in the form of stress, anger, anxiety, shame, despair, and so on.

239. Finding Courage

When you see an injustice happening, you might not have the courage to speak up. The personal risk of saying something can feel too great and you don’t want to deal with the backlash. In some cases, what you get for bringing attention to an injustice might even be financial ruin or physical violence.

But if someone else speaks up, you might then feel the risk of getting involved has been reduced or at least spread out. It now feels possible for you to add your voice, to courageously join in opposing the injustice. To find your courage, you needed someone to show you that speaking up was possible, which helped you see that your aversion to risk could be overcome.

238. To Become A Machine

He expected an organized and productive day. He expected to do everything he had written down on his list. He expected this would be no problem at all. Provided there were no emergencies, no interruptions beyond his control, he would be able to do it. All he had to do was put his head down and concentrate on his work.

He expected success, but success did not arrive. It did not arrive despite his attention being perfectly focused, despite the absence of interruptions, despite everything going right. It did not arrive because tasks that should have taken him an hour ended up taking two.

237. Responding From Awareness

When I finish reading a provocative text, I might feel an urge to respond it with a text of my own. I want to communicate my response in words, just as the original text reached me through language. To do this, I interpret the text through the lens of my existing normative understanding and then I craft a new text that better fits with that understanding.

I might claim success if I construct a response so powerful that it logically defeats the argument of the original text. I might even feel a certain happiness in my ability to do this well. But by prioritizing my own text, I also cut myself off from the possibility of learning from the original text.

236. Our Shared Reality

When I see a beautiful sunset, I can point it out to you and know you will also enjoy it. Not only does the sunset exist for both of us, we’re also likely to judge its beauty in a similar way. But we don’t always make the same judgments. I might enjoy eating spicy food, while you do not. Here, I judge the taste of a spicy dish to be pleasant, while you judge it otherwise.